Fri. Sep 25th, 2020

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Primal Bonding

2 min read

Primal bonding is the process of relating to other individuals in a manner that resembles the normal human psychological process of bonding and trust.

It normally occurs in normal relationships with other humans in the course of normal communication, and through the process of relating naturally to others. And it is something that although rarely thought about or discussed, it is the sometimes-intangible element in human communication that, when operating normally, inspires trust.

You see, in my opinion, the normal state of human communication and credibility is that of a state of trust. Only when trust is violated, or when something occurs that creates a cognitive dissonant situation that makes trust feel shaky, does trust breakdown.

And when we as humans experience a state of lack of trust, for example, once we discover we have been lied to or deceived, we mentally earmark the feelings or experiences that led to the loss of trust, and begin to evaluate future communication or relationships through the lens of the first experience in which we lost trust. And each future instance of a lack of trust adds to our collective knowledge of what a lack of trust looks like. So over time, we accumulate a bank of feelings and experiences through which we look at all future interactions to determine if we should trust or not trust.

Because it is a process that resembles the normal level or accumulation of trust, when we have experiences that erode trust, the level of primal bonding in our relationships experiences deterioration. So if we look at the level of trust we have with someone, we can see the level of primal bonding by looking at the level of trust. If trust is high in a relationship, we have likely experienced factors that increase primal bonding, while not experienced as many factors that erode trust.

So, how is primal bonding relevant to us?

Once we know what it is, and we see what erodes it, now we can work towards processes that increase it. Just because it is a process that normally occurs in the natural process of building relationship and trust with someone, if we identify the elements of it, we can then attempt to emulate the process in our relationships, and increase the bonds of trust and credibility through duplicating the trust-based processes that normally occur in natural relationships.

This means that we can use the elements of primal bonding to improve our relationships, whether those relationships are personal, familial, business, etc., in nature.

Source by Sean Mize

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